To Learn

I've learned over the last few years that it isn't really possible for all of your dreams to come true, and that it ok. Other than that, I don't think there is any one thing that I know enough about to say that I have "learned" it.

Disney World is the bomb, bitches!

A few years ago we spent a week in Disney World, and it was by far the best vacation that we have ever been on. We opted to purchase the meal plan, and both gained about 10 lbs. B lost it in a month, I still haven't. We went to both water parks, and to every park. Because we went the week after Labor Day, the parks were practically empty, and we were able to ride most of the rides multiple times. We rode Space Mountain about five times before I made B leave Tomorrowland.

As juvenile as it may sound, DW is an amazing place to visit. The designers of the parks have done an absolutely amazing job at making it as much an adult's fantasy as a child's. We can't wait to go back; in fact I have been trying to convince B that a 13 month old will REALLY enjoy the most magical place on Earth. He'll probably win, and we'll go back when she is five. I can't wait!

New Orleans, LA

I grew up in the suburbs of New Orleans, first in Harvey and then in Metairie. Even though we live very far away, I still consider it home. Between the food, the seasons (shrimp, crab, crawfish, and king cake), the weather, the food, the culture, the food, the history, and (did I mention) the food, there is just so much to do, see, and eat! I can't wait to take Raquel through the streets of the French Quarter, to feed her gumbo and beignets, and to run her feet over the grass in Audubon Park. I want to share snowballs and levees and glittering parades with her and B.

New Orleans is so much more than a place to drink and eat your self silly. It is a place where you can enjoy life effortlessly, which I cannot wait to do with my growing family!

Self Portrait

When you don't like having your picture taken, it can be difficult to find a picture of yourself that you think is a good representative of what you think you look like. I think I look silly, slightly bitchy, and incredibly bratty. I also really like my eye makeup, minus that weird eyebrow hair.

What is a name?

I don't answer to any nicknames, even though I have over the years. I love my name; I think it is classically beautiful, and it has so much religious and familial meaning. That is why we named Raquel after my grandmother, who I love and respect very, very much.

To quote Forrest, "That's all I have to say about that."

Bryce Addison

I miss Bryce every day. Sometimes it is in a small way...a lady bug lands on a windowsill, or a little blonde boy smiles at me in an office waiting room. Other times I am completely overwhelmed with grief. I am learning to live with it, and it gets easier to handle every day. The pain doesn't go away; it is still as fresh and cutting as ever. I am just learning how to live with it. To actually live, which is exactly what I need to do to honor my son.

Regrets

I spent most of my early and mid twenties regretting choices that I had made, and honestly I just made myself miserable. When I turned 26, I decided that I was done with regrets. Now I try, granted with extreme difficulty, to be as happy as I can. When I have a bad day, I spend as much time with Duke as I need to to turn my mood around. I'm working on forgiving myself more easily, and I try to see B's side of things whenever we disagree. I take a more active role in the major decisions of our household, and more pride in it as well.

I'm not in the headspace I want to be in yet, but I am happy with the progress that I am making. My marriage is better, my dog is happy and content, and both B and I ready for what comes our way.